Giggle Translate #15: Some Mom Advice

Some of my "advice for moms" after it's been run through many different languages with Google Translate [Any comments I make about the translation will be in brackets and in blue]:

1. Original Version:

It is perfectly acceptable to start crying over seemingly small things because you are so sleep-deprived that you can’t think straight.  If you have to change the baby’s outfit again because they got some kind of body fluid on it again, go ahead and cry.  If you just dropped the paper towel for the third time because you are too tired and weak to keep a grip on it, let the tears roll.  Or if all of your children have taken up the tribal chant of “Mom, Mom, Mom, Mom” at the same time, but no one can hear your small, pathetic plea to stop talking because your head is about to explode, then curl up the fetal position in the corner of the room and sob.  That’s not being too emotional; that’s being smart!  If we didn’t let it out in a cry sometimes, we might explode in a fit of rage!

Ever Wonder About Jesus?

 Did you ever wonder about Jesus?  Was He real?  Who was He?  Does it really matter what you think about Him?

Here is a good, hour-long video from a former journalist who sought to disprove Jesus but ended up believing in Him as Lord and Savior: The Case For Christ by Lee Strobel

[Also see my post "Support for Jesus and the Bible"]

Christian Testimony: Brian Welch of Korn

 A short, powerful testimony from Korn's lead singer, Brian Welch (8 minutes).

No one is beyond the reach of God's grace and love, of forgiveness and healing.

Why I could never be an atheist! (repost)

“The fool says in his heart, ‘There is no God.’”  (Psalm 14:1)

“For since the creation of the world God’s invisible qualities - his eternal power and divine nature - have been clearly seen, being understood from what has been made, so that men are without excuse.”  (Romans 1:20)

I have gone through some hard times recently.  (This is a repost from several years ago.)  Not only has there been a bunch of discouraging trials, but these trials have been accompanied by “spiritual droughts” of sorts.  Long, dry spiritual times, the kind that could leave you wondering if you only convinced yourself all along that there is a God.

He has been so silent, so distant ... and at a time when I needed Him to show Himself most.  My soul has ached for more than what He is giving right now.  I cry out, but hear nothing.  I pray and pray about certain things.  And ... nothing happens.

Many prayers have not been answered - prayers for things to be healed, house problems to be fixed, friends to call me back, etc.  I don’t even really want the particular answers as much as I just want evidence that God is listening and cares.  Just answer something, anything, clearly and obviously so that I can know You are there!  Show me that You care! 

I find myself wanting to pull back from God, to retreat into a safe, little, protective shell and tell Him, “Fine, God, I can handle it.  I don’t want anyone – even You – to care about me.  I can accept it.  I'm used to it.  I’m strong enough.”

But the truth is ... I’m not.

Things My Calvinist Pastor Said #12: Depression is a Sin, Job was a Dimwit

(This "Things My Calvinist Pastor Said" series is a breakdown on this much longer post: "We Left Our Church Because of Calvinism," which was written last year but updated July 2020.  They are almost exact quotes.  All memes were created with imgflip.)

12.  "Depression is a sin ... and Job was a dimwit."

(Most of this is from the post "So Job Was A Dimwit, Huh?".)

            What would you call someone who lost everything - their belongings, their livelihood, their children, their health - and who, in their pain, pours out their heartbreak to God as honestly as they can, real and raw and unpolished and unedited?
            What would you call them?  What would you call Job of the Bible as he pours out his heartbreak to God, chapter after chapter?
            My Calvinist pastor, in a recent post he wrote, criticized Job for daring to question the Almighty, for speaking so harshly honestly to God about his pain and suffering and the "unfairness" of life.  He claimed Job was chastised by God, basically saying that Job got put in his place when God got all up in his face and blasted him for several chapters with the message of "Who do you think you are, Job!?!"
            And just what did my pastor call Job, for daring to speak to God the way he did?
            He called Job "dimwitted."
            A dimwit!

The Liberal's Reaction to Election Fraud (and some encouraging Bible verses)

To me, this video clip neatly sums up the reaction of liberal politicians and the liberal media to the possible election fraud this year (the accidents represent the fraud and the guy at the end represents the liberals):

Nothing to see here, move along

(Click here for a picture meme)

And in my Bible reading today, I found a great prayer for America during these uncertain times:

"The Pre-Tribulation Rapture: Outline of End Time Events" from Tracking Bible Prophecy

 For a good look into the events of the End Times, see this post: 

http://www.trackingbibleprophecy.org/rapturetoc.php

I haven't read all of it yet, but I agree (for the most part) with what I've read so far.

[A suggestion for Christians: Go to thrift stores and dollar stores and buy a bunch of Bibles to store in your home for those who are left behind after the rapture.  You can bet that during the tribulation Bibles will be banned, stores will stop selling them, and they will be removed from the internet.  So stock up on a bunch now, and pray that those who need them during the tribulation will find them and share them with others who need them.]

Christian Testimony: Evangeline - "Lust, Drugs, Depression, Heartbreak, New Age to Jesus Christ"

 This is Evangeline's 23-minute testimony.  This is her first YouTube video, posted October 27, 2020 ... so let's show her some encouragement!

In this video, she shares honestly and openly about how she grew up in a Christian home but drifted from the Lord, getting involved with drugs and men, making mistakes along the way.  She shares how she realized that her self-worth was wrapped up in these relationships but that they were not truly fulfilling to her.  At least not in the way we need to be fulfilled deep in our souls.  Only God, only Jesus Christ, can do that!

"Secret Ambition" by Michael W. Smith

 I have always, always loved this song: 

Secret Ambition by Michael W. Smith

I don't know why we don't hear it more often!

If we have a Lord and Savior who is big enough, good enough, and loving enough to face torture and death on a cross so that He Himself could pay the penalty that we owe for our sins so that we could be forgiven and spend eternity with Him, then we can trust that He is big enough, good enough, and loving enough to handle any fear or concern or trial we might be going through right now!

Why Would Anyone Follow Jesus? (repost)

 As I was listening to a Christian radio station, they interviewed a random woman on the street who said, “I think the writers of the Bible just made it up to get people to follow them.”

And I laughed out loud at the thought of that.  I wanted to ask her if she ever really read the Bible, if she knew what it teaches.  Because if she did, she would have to wonder why anyone would make up some of the things we find in the Bible and think it would cause people to go, "Oh yeah, that sounds great to me!"

If you were going to make up a religion and try to get followers, you certainly wouldn’t tell us that ...

Giggle Translate #14: Stupid Chipmunk!

I took my "Stupid Chipmunk" post and ran it through Google Translate a lot of different times to see what happened.


Original Post:
If there's a chipmunk that sits five feet outside your dining room window every morning (where you like to sit in the quiet of the morning with your coffee and Bible, enjoying a few moments of peace before the day gets going) ... and this chipmunk chirps shrill-ly and loudly every 3 seconds for hours on end ... and you want to scare it off by throwing something at it ... let me tell you what NOT to do:

Christian Testimony: Isabella - "How I Found Jesus"

 Here is Isabella's 17-minute testimony: How I found Jesus.

I think many of us can relate to it - about the struggle of trying to relate to the Lord, of drawing near but then falling away.  She understands that a relationship with God takes time and effort.  It doesn't just happen.  You have to work at it.

And you can tell she has a heart to lead others to the Lord, to help them in their relationship with God.  She gives a short, sweet "sinner's prayer" at the end, for others to follow.  (Drink some coffee to keep up with her.  She's a fast talker.)    

[However, I do not agree with her that we can pray to the earth/universe.  That's the mark of a false religion.  But I understand what she's trying to say.  She's trying to say that we shouldn't let not knowing how to pray or what to pray stop us from praying, from calling out to God.  She's saying that God can meet you wherever you are, if you call out to Him.  We don't have to know what to say or how to say it or polish ourselves up first.  He meets us in our mess and confusion and brokenness.  We just have to call out to Him, reach for Him, and He'll find us, wherever we are!

"The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit."  Psalm 34:18

"I love the Lord, for he heard my voice; he heard my cry for mercy... I was overcome by trouble and sorrow.  Then I called on the name of the Lord: 'O Lord, save me!'  The Lord is gracious and righteous; our God is full of compassion.  The Lord protects the simplehearted; when I was in great need, he saved me."  Psalm 116:1-6]

Thank you for sharing your story, Isabella!

Three Good Articles from Rapture Ready

 I found these good articles recently on the Rapture Ready website.  Thought you might like them too:

We Don't Get To Go Home Yet

Think On These Things

Even So, I Will Trust The Lord

"Jericho: The Shout of Victory" by Carman

 In these uncertain days, when evil feels like it's winning and running wild, this song encourages me:

Jericho: The Shout of Victory by Carman

A great reminder that God is always bigger than any obstacle we face!

Using God's Word In Emotional Struggles

 Do you ever feel like Satan is beating you down with negative thoughts, temptations, trials, struggles, fears?

I do.  Daily.  I regularly wake up with anxiety already pressing down on me, trying to worm its way into my mind.  Or more accurately, anxiety has been living in my mind, and every morning before I even get out of bed, it tries to burst its way out, to explode all over me and paralyze me with fear.  I struggle nearly daily with trying to keep it in check, to keep it from running my life.  I've had enough unpleasant things happen in life to make me always anxious for when the next bad moment happens, always waiting for the next shoe to drop, even when things are going okay.  And I had a horrible panic attack once, and I think I live in great fear that I'll lose control over my emotions again someday.  The anxiety can be so bad sometimes that even my own heartbeat can scare me.

Can anyone else understand?

Lord, I Don't Know ... But Hallelujah Anyway!

 We don't often know why things happen the way they do or why God allows what He does, but that's okay.  We don't have to know, because God does.  ("Lord, I Don't Know" by the Newsboys)

And if we're going to be singing "Hallelujah" all eternity anyway, why not start now?  ("Hallelujah" by the Newsboys)

I've found that sometimes the only way to deal with feeling hopeless, downtrodden, and brokenhearted is to sing, even when you don't want to.  In fact, especially when you don't want to. 

Just sing anyway!

Things My Calvinist Pastor Said #11: God Ordains Child Abuse

(This "Things My Calvinist Pastor Said" series is a breakdown on this much longer post: "We Left Our Church Because of Calvinism," which was written last year but updated July 2020.  They are almost exact quotes.  All memes were created with imgflip.)

11.  "God ordained everything that happened in your life, even all the tragedies, even childhood abuse.  It was His 'Plan A' for your life.  For His glory and His purposes, for your good, and because He knew what it would take to humble you.  So you just have to trust Him."  
            This was the sermon when I decided I was done listening to that man!  Saying that God caused your childhood abuse for His glory and to humble you!?!  Wicked, wretched twisting of God's character!  My goodness, do I feel like crying!  (And I was not abused as a child.  But my heart hurt to think of those who were and who had to listen to this horrible, wretched twisting of God's character.  I could almost hear hearts and faith and trust-in-God breaking all over the congregation that day.  And I will include part of that post I wrote at the end of this point #11.)  

16 Minutes You Need To Hear From Billy Graham

 Two powerful mini-sermons from Billy Graham (even though I've been a believer over 30 years, they still hit me deeply):

One Of The Most Powerful Videos You'll Ever Watch  (5 minutes long)

The Speech That Broke The Internet - Most Inspiring Ever  (11 minutes long)

An Election Day Prayer

Dear Heavenly Father,

Thank You that we live in a country that values democracy, that gives us the right to choose our leaders.  This is such a privilege, even when things don't go our way.  Thank You that You gave us a president these last four years who generally stood for Your values, who worked to stop our slide into godlessness and moral decay.  Thank You also, Lord, for Your promise to work all things out for the good of those who love You.  In Your hands, even all the bad, confusing, and messy things are turned into something good and beautiful and worthwhile.  Let us who love You remember always that no matter what happens, You are a good, trustworthy, loving, powerful, wise Father who knows what's best and who is carrying out plans that we can't even fathom.  I thank You that we who trust in You do not have to lean on our own pathetic power and limited wisdom, but that we have a big God whom we can pray to, who answers prayer, who will handle all the things we can't handle and who knows far better than we do about how things should go.

So right now, I choose to put my faith and hope in You, not in the results of this election.  The answer to our prayers is ultimately not in the results of this election, but our answer is You, regardless of what happens in this election.  Whoever is chosen as president is really just a pawn in Your hands, and You have Your reasons for why You allow certain people to get elected.  It is Your job to work out Your plans; it's our job to trust You.  

Two Songs Dedicated to the Upcoming Election

 Here are a couple of Tim Hawkins songs.  Just fur fun.  I dedicate them to the upcoming election:

Jimmy Buffet for President

The Government Can

If you can't do anything about it, may as well have some fun with it!

"Home Church" and Worship Songs

 Since we left our church in May 2019, we have been staying home watching sermons online as a family.  And I've loved it.  I could finally breathe and feel my soul starting to come alive again after years of being suffocated by and angry about the wretched Calvinism growing in our church.  I would rather be home alone with my family every Sunday than spend one more week listening to that Calvinist garbage!

However, I have often thought that it would be nice to meet with at least one other family, doing like a "home church" thing, watching sermons online and discussing them, or just reading the Bible and discussing it amongst ourselves.

And thankfully, we recently met up with another family who has also wanted to do that too, to meet together in a home and just pray together, read Scripture together (verse by verse through a book of the Bible), talk about what we learn from God's Word, and maybe sing.  

We met last week for the first time to do this ... and it was great.  So simple, but so sweet.  Just what I needed.  We're meeting again today and will keep Sundays open for meeting whenever we can.  (And I have one more family in mind who I'd love to join us, if they ever can or want to.)

And since we might like to include worship songs, I compiled some familiar worship songs with lyrics, and I am putting them here in this post so that I can find them easily when we need them.  I'll try to add more as I find them.